45 Days of....

Sometimes I freak out...

When I think about the fact that I only have 45 days (give or take) until Afton graces us with her presense my stomach takes a turn (That's probably Afton kicking me in reality). Don't get me wrong. I am soooo excited I can hardly wait.

But also my whole life will change in 45 days.

I will be a mom.

I will be in charge of a tiny person.

Who can't do anything for herself.

Anything at all...

That is enough to freak out about.

And when I say freak out, I mean it in a good way.

Such as, although I am about to have this life changing experience I am happy too.

I spent my night last night relaxing.

I took a bath, lit some candles, stuck my iphone in my ear and listened to Damien Rice.

I was able to think about my baby and what's ahead. It was wonderful.

Granted my belly wasn't fully submerged in the water due to the fact that I am now huge and our bathtab is on the small side. But that's ok. I actually like being huge...sometimes.

So.....where was I....oh yeah....45 days.

I have 45 days to prepare myself for labor, hopefully without an epidural if my body stays strong and my mind calm. That's the plan right now.

I have 45 days to prepare for the rest of my life.

Now that's something to think about.

Also, I am happy right now.

I have a lot going on, a full plate if you will.

And life always brings drama of some sort, but I am magically calm.

What is there to not be happy about?

I have a wonderful husband.

Example: Tuesday my day was long. I was gone from 8 am to 7 pm. By 7 I was exhausted. Chad got off at 5 then went to two grocery stores and cooked me dinner. How awesome is he?

I have a really good job right now. It's flexible and the people I work with are nice! How's that for a change. They really care about my well being and what's best for me and the baby.

Chad and I are prepared for the baby. We have had to buy one thing...the crib. Everything else our wonderful family and friends have gotten for us.

We are so blessed.

Lastly, we are starting our family.

Our kids will be born under the covenant of the temple.

They will be sealed to us for time and all eternity.

We get to raise our children the way we think will turn them into the good, honest people.

Life is good. So while I am sure there will be a few more "freak outs" over the next 45 days there will be more excitement and happiness about the future.

25 Years Young

Chad turned 25 yesterday. I meant to post a happy birthday blog for him yesterday but I didn't...shame.

We didn't do a whole lot for his birthday unfortunately.

We did get to go to Buffalo Wild Wings...Chad's been wanting to go there since it opened here in Modesto a little while ago. It was really fun to go out for a change. We haven't done it in a while.

Then we went home and cuddled while watching Survivor...boring much? Sorry chad that your pregnant wife has a hard time having energy late at night these days...

But Chad didn't care.

He is a wonderful caring husband who would put me first even on his birthday.

Words cannot describe how much I love him after 3 years of marriage. And having a baby on the way has only strengthened those feelings.

Chad is many things... a hard worker, a loving person, always smiling and joking. He makes our house fun. He loves me no matter what and he is going to make an amazing father in a few short weeks.

Ok, I don't want to get too sappy (too late) but I did want to wish Chad a happy 25th birthday and brag a little about what an amazing husband I have!

33 Weeks

I'm having a pretty hard time wrapping my head around that fact that I will have a baby in two months. My pregnancy so far has flown by and I am positive the next two months will go even faster. I definitely feel huge now. I have grown a lot in the last two months. I am pretty sure there is no mistaking the fact that I am pregnant now :-)
This was at 24 weeks...

This is at 32 weeks...

I am actually feeling pretty good about being "prepared" as far as stuff goes. My wonderful sister graciously gave me ALL her girl clothes from Brielle. So I could probably not get another piece of clothing and be fine until Afton is two :-) (That's not to say I wouldn't gladly accept more clothing though...)
Our nursery is coming along nicely...

Before:

After:

It was a huge relief to get our spare room cleaned out and turned into our nursery. Now there are just a few minor things to adjust and it will be done.

Oliver still thinks the nursery is his room because it's where he sleeps...poor dog. So much is going to change and he has no idea... Here are a few nursery details to share:

The crib, which I've already posted, is the holding place for now of a lot of the clothing that we won't use until Afton's a little older.

Chad's boss gave us this dresser...for free! I love free things. It's still in really great shape, just needs a few adjustments. But it really looks new.

This picture I've had for a while. It's Greg Olsen. I just love it and think it's very appropriate for a brand new baby just sent from Heaven ;-) I'm going with a sort of bird theme if you will. I found these figurines and the clock at a cute decor store in utah when I was there for my shower. All three were under $25 combined. I was so excited to find them.

Chad's cousin Brittany made this cute bow holder for me as a shower present. She also made the black polka dot and the white bows. It also has birds on it...coincidence? (is that how you spell that?

My wonderful friend Lindsey pained me these beatiful pictures to hang in the nursery. I specifically asked her to do them and she gave them to me at my shower. They turned out wonderfully. They also give you an idea of my color scheme.

Finally, I couldn't find any bedding I liked so i decided to make my own. And by that I mean, my mom is helping me sew the bedding. Here are the colors. The quilt is almost done and then we will move on to the bumpers.

This is literally the only thing I have bought for the baby (except the crib of course). I'm saying it's from Oliver because of the cute doggies on it. :-)

We are really getting so excited for Afton to be here! It's flying by and my latest due date is Jan 1st. So that will be here before we know it...

On Money

I often tell Chad that I wish we could have lived in the 1800's.

How nice would it be to not have to worry about cars breaking down? Yes, your horse might die, I'm sure it happened a lot. But let's get real. I think buying a new horse to pull your wagon would be a little less complicated than buying a new car or buying expensive parts to fix your car.

No expensive mortgages or second mortgages. Most of the time they bought their land outright and built their houses.

Also, no electric bills or gas bills. Candles are cheap. And fire, well fire is free.

No cell phones or TV's to distract us and take more of our money. They read books and spent time with their families...isn't that what we are counseled to do anyways?

No credit card bills to worry about. No debt...hmmm...what would that be like?

No expensive gas stations or overpriced grocery stores to worry about. We could grow our own food for the most part and horses just drink water, not gas, thankfully.

Wouldn't that be nice?

Chad usually smiles at me when I talk about this and tells me it wouldn't be quite that nice. And yes, I get that. I get that no A/C in the summer would be miserable. And horses and wagon's take a lot longer than cars to get places. I also understand that you might get pretty bored without TV and cell phones. But they did it, so I am confident I could too. If you didn't know modern technology existed you wouldn't miss it right?

I sincerly want to live in another time period, one more simple. One where money didn't control our world quite as much. But I can't. I live now. I was chosen to come to the earth for this time period for a certain reason and I must deal with the evils of "money" and the hardships that it brings.

There really isn't a certain thing that brought this post on. It's no secret these last few months for us have been hard financially. But we have persevered. We have gotten through it and I believe we are much stronger because of it.

But doesn't it just seem like sometimes you can't get a break??

Do you ever feel like selling everything you have, changing your name and going and living on a farm somewhere and just getting by with what food you can grow on your own? I do!! It won't happen, but sometimes I feel like it. (Again, I am sure it sounds more simple and appealing in my head.)

Satan tries very hard to control us with money and sometimes he succeeds. There are many people out there that are controlled by money. Chad and I try really hard to not be those people, and we aren't. That I can be happy about. This is what I keep telling myself:

Money is only an object.

It won't matter forever.

As long as I have a roof over my head and food to eat, I'm good.

I also keep telling myself that Chad and I work so hard and the fact that we just barely get by doesn't matter. What matters is that we do it on our own. We don't bum off our parents (I'm definitely not putting anyone that lives with their parents down, just for clarification). We also don't live off the government when it would be so easy. We pay our tithing, which I know has a lot to do with why we do always have enough to meet our needs. And we try to be positive.

Who knows, maybe someday we will be "well off." But until then, we will just have to continue to work hard and be happy with what we have.

And I will keep daydreaming about horses and wagons and candles....