Happiness

These last few weeks of unemployment have been hard. Rewarding, but difficult none the less. I have gotten a lot accomplished that I wouldn't have been able to working 40 hours a week, but then the thought of "how am I going to pay all the bills in a few more weeks?" consistently pops in my mind. So that's where my mind is at right now. Content but uncertain. However, the content and happy seem to be outweighing my uncertainty and terror. The reason for this really boils down to one thing: we can chose to be happy or we can chose to be unhappy. Well, I've chosen to be happy. Let me tell you how I've been doing that:

First, I've been having faith. This was not so at first and I must admit that breakdowns and tears have been more abundant than I would like in the last few weeks. But so many things have happened that have almost forced me to have faith. I know forcing faith kind of defeats the whole purpose, but you get what I'm saying right? Good. Last week, Thursday or Friday, I was searching for jobs online and getting more upset by the minute thinking it was an impossible to task to find a job as quickly as I needed to. I just happened to walk by the front door and saw this:
Someone had slid a torn out page from some kind of proselyting manual into our front door. I have no idea from what book it came or from what religion the person who slid it into my door belongs to, but I do know that the message that person decided to share with me is universal. And it's what I needed to hear to keep getting through my day. Let me share:
"Faith includes knowing the way that the promises of God apply to me. Faith is believing in Jesus. It means knowing about him, that he taught about the kingdom of God, that he performed miracles showing the he was sent from God, and that he died on the cross for sinners. It also means being confident and sure that Jesus died for my sins. Through faith I know that Jesus loves me. Faith involves knowledge and assurance, and it it also a relationship that involves both head and heart. Faith comes from hearing the message 'God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life' (John 3:16)."

It was a sweet but simple message. So I owe a thank you to whoever decided to help me that day and motivate me to keep having faith that everything will work out the way it should.

Second, I was asked to give a talk in church this last Sunday. My topic: The Atonement. I was a bit overwhelmed with the topic but it ended up being just what I needed. There isn't a better way to forget about your own problems and trials than to focus on the Savior and all he went through for us. In preparing my talk I came across one statement given by Elder Russell M Nelson that really helped me to forget about my problems: "When we comprehend His voluntary Atonement, any sense of sacrifice on our part becomes completely overshadowed by a profound sense of gratitude for the privilege of serving him."

Third, I have a lot to be happy about:
A wonderful husband who is going to be a great father...(we watched our neighbors son for a little while on Saturday and this is what he preferred to do the whole time :-)
A cute dog who makes me smile when I am sad:
And a little girl to look forward to in just a few short months...

Life is hard, but life is good.