Teaching our children the importance of gender and family

"The philosophy of the world follows Satan: “Do your own thing.” “What’s in it for me?” “If you think it’s right, it’s right.” “If it feels good, do it.” As a result of such thinking, people turn away from God and focus on themselves, doing just what Satan himself wanted to do—setting themselves up as the judges of what is right and wrong and taking to themselves all honor and glory. They treat other people largely as a means to their own gain, their own pleasure. Ultimately, they are miserable—because happiness is the result of becoming like God, not like Satan." A Parent's Guide, a manual published by the LDS church.

A friend told me today about this manual she came across and how there was so much great relevant information about how to teach our children just how important families are. In light of recent happenings in the media that deal with gender and families, I have been thinking a lot about this subject.

How do I teach my children what is right and wrong without alienating others around me who don't believe the same? How do I teach my children the importance of God, faith, gender and families when there are so many other forces and opposition working against me? How can I show my children the same love and acceptance that my Father in Heaven shows me?

I've read through this manual a little now and am astounded at how relevant it still is today. It was published 30 years ago but still speaks to me as a parent as if it was published this year. The above quote really stuck out to me for a few reasons. I am not a shy person when it comes to speaking what I believe to be the truth. I was the editor for my school newspaper, got a degree in Print Journalism from The University of Utah and have always loved writing. I love to write for other people to read, especially when it is a topic I feel passionately about. With that said, I never want to write something that hurts someone else. I never want to treat another human being as though they are less than me just because they are different from me. But I also strongly believe that we must stand up for what we believe in. We must speak the truth even if others don't want to hear it.

I have been taught from a very young age that my (our) whole purpose in living on this earth is to learn and grow and return to a loving Father in Heaven. I came to this earth not only to gain a body, but also to learn everything I need to and gain a family and strive to return to heaven to live with that family forever. If I truly believe that, then how can I quiet my growing anxiety about how this world treats this precious subject?

I don't believe I can.

I believe I must let others know the importance of gender and the importance of the differences between men and women. The beautiful, wonderful differences. I also can't stand by when those difference are dragged through the mud and spit upon. 

Just as the quote states above, Satan is working harder than anyone else to destroy the true image of what a family is supposed to be. He wants us to think that we can chose or change our gender. He wants us to believe that we can have a family with someone of the same gender. He wants us to believe that marriage is not a necessary part of family. He wants us to believe that being a parent isn't an important role and that we can place our careers and own selfish desires before this sacred responsibility.

And you know what, a lot people believe him. And because people believe him, a lot of people suffer. A lot of people suffer with trials and hard ships I can't begin to understand. I don't have all of the answers, but I do know that if we trust in our Heavenly Father's plan for us and follow His commandments, everything else will fall into place. That is not an easy task these days.

I don't diminish the fact that some people truly do feel like they were given the wrong gender or feel attracted to those of the same sex. I can't say to those people, stop feeling the way you feel. That would be like telling myself to stop losing my temper or stop having negative feelings about people around me. I struggle with those things and it is because I am an imperfect person trying to learn how to be perfect. For me, that is what is comes down to. We are all given different trials and hard ships to deal with in this life. It is up to us to deal with them and learn from them and take our Heavenly Fathers example and use the power of His Son's atonement in our life to make up the rest.

None of us can be perfect in this life, but we can try our best. We can try our best to stand up for what we believe and teach others as well. And we can try our best to love everyone unconditionally just like our Father in Heaver and our Savior does.

Happiness is the result of becoming like God. I truly believe that. I can say that I am happy and I know it because I am striving to live like my Heavenly Father would want me to. And that is how I will teach my children. I will teach them how to love themselves and those around them. I will try to always show them compassion and empathy and acceptance. I will strive to teach them that they have an important role in our family, whether male or female. I will teach them that they have an important role in this life and in eternity and that that role cannot be fully realized unless we accept our gender and the important role that it plays in our families. I only hope my children can gain the same love that I do for the gospel of Jesus Christ. In the meantime, I will do everything I can as a mom and a human being to make sure they are set on the right path.

And one of the most important parts of that is making sure they understand how I feel and what I believe to be the truth.